If you've been following this blog, you'll know me as "The Keeper."
I always promised that I would leave this blog strictly to my dolls to run, but today I decided to make an exception. (This is also the very first time I've ever done a "box opening." This arrival is quite special!)
(As a side note, you'll have to forgive me for Pastel's lack of updates this summer. She has had stories to share, but I have not given her the time she needed to share them. With this new arrival, I imagine that will change.)
Today I had a very special package arrive at my doorstep. For a long time, I thought this day would never come.
I'll back up a little though in order to explain why this package was so meaningful to me.
(Confession: I'm a bit shy about sharing this story with you all. I'm trying to convince myself that if you're a visitor of this blog, you must also be a "doll person" and you will get where I'm coming from with all this.)
When I was in grade school, I was a dreamer. I always had my "head in the clouds." I created this whole little world in my head, and I was constantly drawing the fantastic creatures and beings that lived in it. It was my little escape, and it made me so happy.
And then one night nearly a decade ago, something terrible happened. It was so terrible, it completely shattered me. I was a different person for several years after. I lost so many people that were once close to me during this time. I felt like everything was spiraling out of my control. The worst part? My little world, my special place, vanished. For years, I stopped drawing completely. I couldn't create anything. I was completely lost.
Life isn't always like a fairytale. Something didn't happen to magically bring me back. Things slowly improved as time passed. I began to pick up the pieces again. During this time, I got married, bought a house, and had a beautiful son. Even still, I was missing something important.
In October of 2009, just a few months after my son was born, I taught myself to sew a plushie. That was the first step at truly recovering myself. It was the first time in a long time that I created anything. It was through the crafting sites that I discovered the world of BJD's, and of course, Den of Angels.
I had always loved dolls. My room used to be filled with porcelain dolls (that were sadly all put away when my teenage self deemed them "uncool"). These ball jointed dolls were like none I had ever seen before. I was eager to read everything about them. I spent hours and hours reading the discussion threads of DoA.
And that's when I discovered a little thread about Charles' Creature Cabinet Fireflies.
I was sucked in immediately. Here was a community of people that remembered how to play. There was something about this thread that was unlike any of the other doll threads I had read. It was like entering a magical world. And that's when something truly amazing (for me, at least) happened. I pulled out my dusty sketchbook and drew a picture of a firefly. I desperately wanted this doll that had inspired such a fantastic community, and that at long last had inspired me.
Unfortunately, I was just a few months too late. It was at this point that CCC started having issues with getting dolls out. I won't go into the details as I imagine many of you reading this already know it. I was heartbroken not only for myself, but even more so for all the poor people that were out so much money. I silently watched as this amazing community rallied together and managed to get many of these dolls to their rightful homes. It was truly a wonderful thing to see.
I watched several fireflies go up for sale as time passed. With each one, my heart sank a little more. They were selling second hand for stunning prices. I think the first one I saw was in the six hundred dollar range, and the next in the nine hundred, with one even going into the thousands. I knew there was no chance I would bring home a firefly.
I went back to ghosting the firefly thread. It took me nearly three years to finally join in, by the way. The community had come to mean so much to me, that I was terrified if I joined, I would spoil the magic. I had already tried to join a different doll discussion, and had had a negative experience. I couldn't bear the thought of losing sight of this magical little world this little doll had inspired.
May she always remind me to never again let anyone (or anything) dull my sparkle.
(Confession: Yes, I got teary eyed as I did this very long awaited box opening.)